Solitude: Finding our own “lonely place” (part 1)

(The first of a three-part posting about seeking times and places of solitude in the midst of our busy lives)

“In the morning, long before dawn, he got up and left the house, and went off to a lonely place and prayed there.” Mark 1: 35

What surrounds this short piece of scripture In Mark’s gospel is a description of just how hectic Jesus’ life was. He was constantly on the move, walking from town to town, preaching in the synagogues, healing the sick, casting out demons, and dealing with impatient disciples. But in the midst of all this activity, he knew the importance of getting away and being quiet for a while. It’s an important lesson for us all to learn.

We’re all busy and our lives are chock-full of “stuff.” This stuff is mostly necessary, no doubt. We need to do the things we need to do, like go to work, take care of our homes and children and spouses, contribute to our communities and churches, volunteer to help others and good causes, and spend time with our favorite people. It’s all good. But it’s exhausting.

Like Jesus, we need to have our “lonely place,” that quiet sacred space we can go, not just to get away from the world and its busy-ness, but to prepare ourselves more fully for our engagement in the world.

Some of my favorite spiritual writers, like Henri Nouwen and Thomas Merton, have written much about solitude and its place in their spiritual lives. For Merton, who lived virtually his entire adult life in a monastery and much of that as a hermit, living alone out in the woods, solitude was his way of life and the fountain from which his spirituality and writing flowed. Other than his writing, he was called to a life filled more with solitude than action, although he constantly struggled with that balance, as his journals show. His life and approach to prayer is fascinating and insightful for all of us who seek a deeper relationship with God, but very few of us are called to that kind of extreme solitude.

Henri Nouwen, the renowned Dutch theologian and spiritual writer, lived a more balanced life of solitude, interaction and engagement with the world. He writes eloquently about our need for solitude as a primer for our action in his brief book, “Out of Solitude: Three Meditations on the Christian Life”:

“Somewhere we know that without a lonely place our lives are in danger. Somewhere we know that without silence words lose their meaning, that without listening speaking no longer heals, that without distance closeness cannot cure. Somewhere we know that without a lonely place our actions quickly become empty gestures. The careful balance between silence and words, withdrawal and involvement, distance and closeness, solitude and community forms the basis of the Christian life and should therefore be the subject of our most personal attention.”

The solitude to which God calls people like you and me is just the kind described in Mark’s gospel. It is that special, lonely place where we can go to spend time with ourselves and with God. It is prayer, whether or not a word is spoken. Solitude is time alone, in quiet, in the presence of God. Solitude is about being comfortable with ourselves and our relationship with God. It is about going to the deep well where God lives and where we are our most authentic selves. It is about being more fully aware of our presence in the world and of God’s presence in our lives.

Next Saturday: More on why we need solitude and some places I have found mine…